First Baby Shower

Today I am going to one of my best friend's baby showers.  I really cannot put into words how excited I am to help her celebrate this day.  There really is nothing in the world that I love more than seeing my best friend's dreams come true.  What is more special than that?  This is her first baby, a girl.  I know that her and her husband tried for awhile before conceiving so that seems to make the unborn babe even a little more special.  Since I am far away from having a baby shower thrown in my own honor, I get to live vicariously through her for the day. 

This is the first baby shower I have attended.  Since I have never been to one, I have contemplated what we, a group of all women, will do for 3 hours.  I'm thinking: great (read: fattening and greasy) appetizers, possibly some adult beverages so us non-pregnant guests can get a lil' tipsy, games that include melted candy bars in dirty diapers and guessing the circumference of my friend's pregnant belly (how mortifying! that game will absolutely NOT be allowed at my shower!!), and of course gift opening.  And that is what I think we will be spending the majority of the party doing.  Watching the mom-to-be opening gifts.

I have a thing for gifts.... and I love watching people opening them.  I find it to be much more fun to be on the watching end rather than the unwrapping end.  As a watcher you are not required to fake it when you open something that is [chose one: ugly, stinky, humongous, out of style, useless, cheap, something you already own, or (the worst) something ambiguous....ie. is this a doily, a tablecloth, a curtain or a hand towel?].  

I picture how different this would be if our culture practiced New Dad Showers and there was a bunch of men sitting around watching their guy friend opening gifts for his soon to be born child.  I think instead of ooohs and aaaahs you would be hearing more of "what the fuck do you use that for?" and "what's a onesie?" and "you think you'll actually USE that wipe warmer dude?"  

When you're in a group of all women and the giver is watching the opener's every breath, everyone is basically required to ooooh and aaaah over ev-er-y-thing.  I think there is a part of us women who are not only trying to make the mom-to-be happy about her gift, but are also trying to impress the rest of the women there too. 

Which is why I made damn sure my gift would be the cutest one there.  No really.  Look.