Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Home Sweet Home

I've lived in a great apartment in midtown for the last 4 years.  This is the longest I have lived in one place since I was 15 years old.  Recently there was the possibility that I was going to have to move, however that has since been resolved and I will definitely be staying in my apartment for now. When faced with the possibility of moving and then finding out I would be staying, I now have an even deeper love for my place of residence.  Here's my fav list for my apartment:
  • Beautiful hardwood floors
  • Fan in the dining room
  • Cute teal tile in the bathroom
  • Gas oven/stove in the kitchen
  • Gas heater in the living room works like a charm and takes only 20 minutes to heat my whole place
  • A/C in the bedroom is right where I want it when it's an 80 degree night
  • No roommates (except my cute kitties)
  • Cat policy has always been "don't ask don't tell" (all the tenants have cats)
  • Cable is free
  • Trash pick-up is free
  • Water is free
  • Wifi provided by the owners
  • Rent is cheap compared to the rest of the greater Sacramento area
  • Connected parking garage is safe
  • Maintenance issues are fixed within a day or 2
  • Huge windows in the living and dining room face east so I get great morning sun
  • 2nd floor means I do not look at another building or fence out my front windows
  • Apartment manager is friendly and lives in the complex
  • Mailbox is 20 steps from my door
  • Gated complex (keeps out the majority of the crazies)
  • Walking distance to countless parks, restaurants, bars and coffee shops
  • Coin laundry onsite
  • Landscaping is well maintained
  • Excellent water pressure in the shower
  • Have never needed to use a plunger on my toilet (don't even own one)
  • Trees right outside my living room window bloom with the most gorgeous pink blossoms in late summer
  • All my bedroom furniture fits in the bedroom
  • Safeway within 1 mile
  • Gym within 1 mile
  • Easy access to all major freeways
  • 15 minutes from airport
Thank God I get another year!!

Monday, June 21, 2010

Book Share

I am an avid reader/bookworm/nerd and therefore have decided that I will be sharing any interesting or noteworthy books I happen to come across.  First up: Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough, by Lori Gottlieb. 


I had to get past the title of this book because the word "settle" has such negative connotations associated with it, especially with regards to marriage.  The book's overall message is a good one and I've summed it up in a few statements:
  1. "Settling" in this book does not refer to lowering your standards as much as it does recognizing and valuing what truly matters for the long term in creating a fulfilling and successful marriage.  A better term is "readjust" your standards, meaning figure out your needs versus your wants and try not to confuse the two.  Gottlieb learns it is not realistic to create a list of fifty or more needs, in fact she suggests narrowing it down to just three or four.
  2. Nowadays, there is a sense of entitlement when it comes to dating that makes many women feel like they deserve the very best of the best, a textbook prince charming if you will, and they will not rest until they find that person.  The problem with this thinking is that there are no perfect men in the world and these women could potentially be waiting forever to find that imaginary prince who fits the bill.  Not to mention, what makes you so sure that if Mr. Perfect happened to walked into your life, he would have any interest in marrying you?  Which leads me to...
  3. ...you are not perfect either!  Who are you to expect someone else to be completely perfect?  Really if you are lucky enough to find someone who loves you and accepts you in spite of your less-desirable traits, why is it so hard for you to do the same in return?
  4. Instead of focusing on surface traits which do not really effect the long term relationship potential (the initial butterflies, how romantic he is, age, weight, height, body hair, having similar interests, the way they talk, the way they laugh, job, income), focus on the qualities that make a great spouse (good listener, honest, respectful, caring, supportive, humility, trustworthy, optimistic, passionate, hard working).  Unfortunately when dating, we tend to focus too much on the first list instead of the second list.
  5. One point the author drives home repeatedly is that dating when you are over the age of 40 is much different than dating when you are 30. The unfortunate truth is that the number of available men continues to decline the older we get.  Statistically, single men in their 40s have a much higher chance of being previously married, and it's also quite possible they'll already have kids which can add extra complications to an already challenging dating situation. Older men can and do date much younger women, and may desire dating women who are childless, fertile and young enough to have children with. That is not to say that all hope is lost if you are 40+ and single, however you could be competing with 20-30 somethings for the same men. 

The author gains her insight from her own dating experiences as well as interviews with psychologists, professional matchmakers, religious leaders, authors of other self-help books and friends who are out in the dating and married world giving testimonials on their experiences. Unlike other self-help books on marriage or partner selection, there are no exercises, worksheets or lists to create. Overall, I enjoyed this book and found it to be a quick read; I finished it in 3 days.

If you have a strong desire to get married but have been struggling with picking the wrong guys and unable to pinpoint why, I suggest reading this book.  This is also an excellent book for women who are already dating great guys but have a nagging sense that their guy is just not what they "pictured" themselves ending up with.  Even married women may find that they benefit from getting a fresh perspective on their marriages after reading this book.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Father's Day

Today is Father's Day.  I found the best card to give my dad.  I could not have written this better if I'd done it myself:

Dad,
I was thinking about
when I was little.
How I'd wait for you 
to get home
so I could tell you
about what happened that day.

Maybe show you my new shoes, 
or a picture I'd made.
Ask for your help with something
I was trying to figure out.

And what I remembered most,
was feeling that no matter what
I couldn't wait to share,
it was important to you.

And then I thought,
some things never change.

On Father's Day Dad,
I wanted to say "thanks"
for making sure
your little girl grew up
knowing she had a dad
who loved her.

Love You Too.


Monday, June 14, 2010

Wedding Reading

I was asked to do a reading in one of my girlfriend's weddings this summer. I am truly honored anytime one of my friends asks me to be a part of their special day. Although I gladly accepted her request, I was a little worried that the reading might be from the Bible and since I am not a regular Bible reader nor church-goer, I am not always sure where to put the emphasis on the Hebrew language. It turns out the reading is in English:
Marriage Joins Two People in the Circle of Its Love
by Edmund O’Neil
“Marriage is a commitment to life, to the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other human relationship can equal; a joining that is promised for a lifetime. Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life’s most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other’s best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and critic. There may come times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and the love of the other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child. Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller; memories are fresher; commitment is stronger; even anger is felt more strongly, and passes away more quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing love through the seasons of life. When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential, made in the hearts of two people who love, which takes a lifetime to fulfill.”
I like it.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Pet Peeves at the Gym

I entered a gym for the first time 10 years ago when I was a sophomore in college.  Although I did not realize it at the time, this was an ideal way to initiate myself into the world of The Gym.  My college gym was basically a frat party without the alcohol and instead of pool tables and couches, there were workout machines and weights. It was a see and been seen kind of scene.  Most sorority girls "worked out" complete with FULL faces of makeup, perfectly curled bouncy ponytails,  perfume and matching spandex shorts and sports bras.  Frat guys went to the gym to watch stare at the sorority girls.  If I could survive in there, I could survive in any gym. 

I now have grown to love and look forward to my workouts at my local gym.  I love that the gym makes me happy.  I love that I feel invisible when I have my iPod earbuds in.  I love that that I now have a continual desire to learn more about my body and how it works.  I love that when I log all those gym hours, I do not want to be eating anything unhealthy. 

And now that I have listed the things I love about the gym, I would like to express some of the dislikes:

My pet peeves at the gym:
  • Trainers who feel it necessary to jog everywhere throughout the gym to maximize their calorie burn.
  • When the man on the cardio machine next to me has clearly forgotten to wash his gym clothes for a week and also forgot to use his deodorant that day. 
  • Anytime someone offers unsolicited advice on how I am working out wrong.
  • Broken drinking fountains.
  • Broken equipment that stays broken for weeks. I pay dues. Get the shit working.
  • Trainers who are not able to add my body fat percentage and instead ask for me to confirm if that sounds right?
  • People Guys who drop their weights at least 2 feet from the ground when they are done with sets just to make sure everyone around them knows just how hard that last rep was.
  • People Guys who grunt so loudly that it sounds like an f-ing hippo is loose in the gym just to make sure everyone around them knows just how hard that set was.
  • When the person using the cardio machine next to me is talking on their cell phone.*
  • Men in spandex.
  • Group instructors who sing into the microphone. Pure ear torture.
  • When the microphone system in my Lift class cuts in and out and the instructor is then forced to yell when it cuts out and it cuts back in right when they are screaming.
  • Cardio Bouncers. (folks who bounce so excessively on their elliptical GLIDER machines that they make me sea sick when they're in my line of vision. You can tell that they think they are really challenging themselves. Quit with the bouncing. The less you bounce, the harder the workout.)
  • Bad form. Not only hard to watch but also potentially dangerous/injurious.
  • Step Mill Leaners. If you are not able to stand upright and climb, slow down the machine. Otherwise you are just dangling there and moving your legs a little.

* If you are able to carry on a full on conversation while on a cardio machine, you are not getting your heartrate up anywhere near high enough to be effective. Funny how the person talking always seems to be someone who needs that extra workout or 14.


Tuesday, June 8, 2010

What $50/night will get you

Once upon a time, my great friend Bubbles invites me to be her date for her company Christmas Party. The party is to be held near Lake Tahoe at a Ski Resort (oooo swanky) and we decide to make a weekend of it... Christmas Party + Tahoe + Snow + Bubbles + me = crazzzy times.

Drive up the mountain is easy, no chain controls and no traffic at all. We check into our 2 star hotel (what $50/night will get you)... and no joke the stench of the hotel lobby is similar to a casino built in the 50's. It is so bad that when we leave our eyes are burning, and we are only in there for maybe 10 minutes tops. We are amazed that The Front Desk Lady is able to stand it.

We get to our hotel room and we agree it is decent enough however it is colder in our room than in the hotel hallway. I turn on the wall "heater" – and realize it is merely pumping in the cold air from outside. Off with that. I then turn on the space heater (one of those old fashioned oil-filled ones) and it S-L-O-W-L-Y starts to push out something warmer than the air in our room. Good sign….however you can only feel the heat if you hold your hand about a ½ inch in front of it. We have no TV remote and we get 9 channels - 1 of them Spanish and 1 QVC. None come in clearly.

We decide to start getting ready and I go to take my shower. I say a quick prayer for hot water. I turn on the shower and I will say there is outstanding water pressure. Ice cold water starts shooting out of the nozzle - however the majority of it instead of shooting into the tub is shooting out the side of the shower head - right into my face and all over the bathroom floor. I try to block the water with the shower curtain as I reach under it to adjust the water to a better temperature. That water was no more than 40 degrees and I briefly wonder if it is being pulled right from the snow bank outside. It is F-ing COLD. I adjust the shower head to spray into the tub and finally feel the water get a little bit warmer, still not anything I would want to shower in.... and then without warning, it is scalding hot. Of course. Like to the point that I do not want to touch it. I play around with the faucet for awhile and finally get it adjusted to a bearable temperature. The water pressure is so strong and the water is so hot that it quickly gets so steamy in the bathroom that it is hard to see to shave my legs. But at least it is hot! And then all of a sudden it is literally pitch black. I can not see an inch in front of my face. My first thought is oh shit the power went out and I am NAKED then I vaguely remember that the bathroom lights had one of those timer switches. I get out and feel my way around the wall and find the switch. Success I can see again! I quickly finish so as not to waste any additional hot water and Bubbles gets in to take her shower. She finishes showering, gets out and we are standing talking to each other in just our towels and all of a sudden, the fire alarm goes off.

We go into the hallway to see if everyone is evacuating and we realize it's just going off in our room. Two brilliant minds working together, we finally figure out it’s getting triggered because of all the shower steam. So we fan the smoke detector for awhile and say to each other -
"Well, at least we know the fire alarm works!"
We find a movie on TV and start doing our makeup and hair. Then the power goes out for real. We go out in the hallway again to see if there is power out there and sure enough the hall lights are on, power's just off in our room. Bubbles calls the front desk and asks The Lady if someone can come turn it back on. Lady says she would send Joe on over to help. We wait for about 15 minutes in the dark and as we are under a bit of a time crunch we are starting to get a little antsy. I call the front desk again and ask how long she meant exactly when they said Joe is on his way. Like - is he on his way walking here from Hawaii or is he on his way from next door? Lady reassures me that Joe is on the property and on his way.

Sure enough soon after that Joe shows up, a nice old grandpa in his sweat suit, and he asks what exactly we have plugged in at one time. The tally is: bathroom heat lamp, 2 hairdryers, a hair straightener, a phone charger, every single lamp and light, the space heater and the TV. He admonishes us for having so many things going at once and warns us that this place is older than him so we have to be careful not to blow the place up. Good advice. I unplug the charger and turn down the heat. Joe flips the breaker and everything comes back on. He leaves and maybe 3 minutes later the power goes out again. We move the hair dryer and straightener to separate plugs and turn off a lamp. Bubbles flips the breaker switch herself (because we don't want to bother poor Joe and we now know exactly where the switch is) and continue to get ready and about a minute later the power goes out again. This time we unplug everything except one lamp and the hairdryer. And flip the breaker again. We hurry up and get ready and make it to the party just in time.

It is an awesome shindig, they really spare no expense. There are lavish decorations, huge ice sculptures on the tables and amazing raffle prizes, the biggest of which is a 45 inch flat screen TV! We don't win anything but regardless we have a great time. After the party, we head back to the hotel. Bubbles invites some of her co-workers to come with us so we can all go out together after. We have a moment of panic on the drive back thinking that we had left without plugging the heater back in and that the room would now be a freezer and the beers we had left to chill in the snow on our balcony would be an exploded frozen mess.

We get back to the hotel and the now completely booked place has not one parking space left. I go back into the ashtray/front office and ask where we should park. Lady suggests we park at the Biltmore next door. (The Biltmore is a 2 star casino for you non-Californians.) I go back to the waiting car to report this and Bubbles does not like that idea one bit and she goes up to have words with the Lady. I tell her to be nice, it is not Lady’s fault. Once in there Bubbles realizes Lady is nice and she somehow convinces her to let us park in one of the two handicapped spots. Ironically, the only 2 parking spots in the entire lot that are not plowed are the handicapped ones. Brilliant. The snow is not deep so we can get the car in there but it is deep enough that Bubbles, her friend Jessica and I are a sight to see trying to maneuver in our high heels and cocktail dresses out of the car in the snow and towards our building.

Crisis averted, turns out one of us did remember to turn the heat back on before we left and the beers on the balcony are not frozen, but perfectly chilled adult beverages ready to be consumed. We change and go out the casinos, walking distance from the hotel. It is a fun night but hardly any sleep. I think I go to bed around 3:30ish. I wake up at 7 and pack up both of our stuff, wake up Bubbles and shuffle her to the car and drive us home. Just in time, it is raining the entire drive down the mountain = snowing in Tahoe!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

My First New Car

When I graduated from college, my mom was generous enough to buy herself a new car and give me her old one.  (In the car's defense was not THAT old.  It was a '95 Honda Civic, 4 doors, stick shift, cute, white and had a moon roof!)  If you know anything about Hondas, you know they have a reputation of lasting forever.  My family is a Honda Family.

I will never forget that Thanksgiving in 2002 when my mom had my cousin and I go car shopping for her. She was pretty sure she knew what kind of car she wanted (a CRV) and she also knew she did not want to deal with the car salesmen.  So she sent us instead to test drive and browse the options. We met a nice salesman (no, really!), test drove a few cars and then sent her to do the deal. Now I knew that there was a possibility that my mom would trade in her old Civic to cut down the cost of her new car.  But inside I was reeeally hoping she would give the Civic to me. (Bear in mind that my very first car was an '86 Mazda Hatchback with no radio or speakers that was falling apart at the seams.  It died on me at the beginning of my junior year of college, and sat collecting dust parked behind my sorority house until a Mexican left a barely legible note on it telling me he would buy it for $100.  I sold it to him. I hadn't had a [functional] car for 2 years and was forced to walk everywhere or bum rides off my boyfriend and sorority sisters. So yeah, I wanted needed a car.) When Mom walked out of the dealership, she handed me the key to her old car.  I was beyond thrilled!  My Mom was an angel from heaven and there were rainbows falling from the sky and soft fluffy kittens playing at my feet. My cousin and I drove back to school down the coast highway with every window down and the radio playing as loud as it would go.  We felt like we were 16 again. 

Fast forward 5 years to 2008 and the Civic which had served my mom and I so well now had 213,000 miles on it and was on her last legs.  The last year I had her she required numerous costly repairs, to the point where the repairs were exceeding the value of the car.  That is when you stop and ask yourself why am I still pouring money into this old beat up car?  There was one week in particular where I was driving a rental car (as my Civic was not starting) and I had this moment of clarity (ah-HA!) and decided it was time to stop wasting money on repairs and rentals cars and go buy myself a new one.  I called in sick to work and walked down to the rental car, parked next to my old Civic.  Some weird gut sense in me told me to try to start the ol car one last time.  You will never believe this -- she started!  I took that as a sign and drove straight over to the Honda dealership.

I knew what I wanted: a brand new 2008 Honda Accord Coupe. The coupe was so much cuter than the 4 door.  I do not have any kids and do not plan on having any in my foreseeable future, so I fugure why not display that fact prominently.  After test driving the car, I went into the dealership to do The Deal.  I knew I probably looked like the ideal prey for any decent salesman.  I mean, come on, this was my first car buying experience, I was alone, single and driving a p.o.s. with a huge dent in the side of it (some amazing kid backed into me in a parking garage and I took the insurance money and paid off my credit card. Priorities.)  I think I surprised even myself as I had done my research and knew what I could get my new car for and what I could get for the trade in value on the Civic.  We went back and forth for at least 4 hours until I was finally satisfied.  I signed the paperwork and the car was mine! 

About 20 minutes after I'd signed the deal, one of the techs who worked at the dealership came up to me and asked if I'd ever had problems with the Civic not starting.
"Nope."

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Purple Power

Here's a pic of the adorable Dell laptop that I am considering purchasing:

Too Cute!  I'm in love with the Plum Purple color!

Yes, I realize I should look at things other than just the aesthetic appeal but I can't help it!!

Grandma Dinner

My Grandma lives in the same city as me and therefore I try to make an effort to see her at least once a week for dinner. Her dinners always includes a Grandma Salad and the ingredients depend on what produce is in season...but can include: spinach, romaine lettuce, celery, green onions, pineapple, avocado, tomatoes, feta cheese, pomegranate seeds, strawberries, cantaloupe and sunflower seeds. Yum! Lucky for me she has the time to shop around and find the best produce and prices in the area. I have tried in vain to recreate the Grandma Salad on my own, but alas my versions just do not compare. She is the queen of the Salad. Hence the name Grandma Salad.

Gran is 88 years old this year. Which means she was born in -- get this -- 1922!! Despite her age, she is chugging along and I would take bets that she will make it to being a centenarian. A few pieces of wisdom I have learned from The Gran:
  • Make an effort to move your body everyday, regardless of the weather outside.
  • Eat approximately 8 servings of vegetables at dinner.
  • Women do not need men to survive.
  • Nordstroms Rack has the best deals around. And the Nordstroms credit card has a great points program.
  • Cats love to be petted, especially when they are meowing. Orange peels keep cats from peeing wherever the peels are placed.
  • Fresh flowers are a must and are most affordable when picked from the neighbors yard. 
  • Being old has its advantages, such as being able to sneak your own snacks and water into River Cats games (no security guy is going to search her bag) and she can easily get the front of a crowd for a better view at events like the PGA Tour and the Amgen Tour of CA.
  • Those fragrant purple flowers that smell like garlic are edible!
  • Kleenex can be reused until it is falling apart. In fact, so can most things.

Away we go

I am not sure that anyone will ever read this other than me, and that is ok with me. I figured it would be easier to keep track of a journal that Google keeps track of for me. And also just in case my house (read: apartment) ever burns down and every diary I have ever owned along with it.

So, Locket, I'm trusting you to keep my stories alive and words spelled right and we will get along fine.

And away we go.