Thank you Jiminy Cricket

If one chooses to consume Weight Watchers Smart Ones microwaveable meals,

 

not only are they assured to be 2 servings of warm, satisfying, delicious and "fork-free" food, you get a guilty conscious reminder right in the instructions just in case your conscious is not always your food guide. 

Wise tip for the Budget Conscious

When shopping at the money pit of all money pits (aka Target*) NEVER make the mistake of allowing yourself to stroll the aisles with the aid of an entire shopping cart.  Instead, take only a shopping basket.  If you are feeling exceptionally frugal and graceful that day, challenge yourself to use nothing but your own 2 hands.  Instant guaranteed savings of at least $20. Enjoy.



*Damn you Target and your $5 DVDs and your fantastic smelling candles and your holiday section and your incessant sale prices on all semi-necessary necessities. 

Idealism at it's finest

As the holidays are approaching, I have been thinking alot about traditions.  This is a word that brings up many strong emotions for me... my family used to have many traditions and I found great comfort and enjoyment in them and their predictability.  Unfortunately my family has virtually no traditions anymore.  Through the years I have conceptualized hypothetical traditions that I hope to do with my own family once I have my own family.  I want my children to have stable and predictable yearly events that they can expect and look forward to with anticipation.  A few of the ideas I have:

Seasonal decorations -- decorating the house for upcoming seasons or holidays.  This would include (but not limited to: Christmas Tree and other Christmas decor, Valentines Day, Easter, Summer, 4th of July, Halloween and Thanksgiving and fall in general.  I do not picture lots of cheap gaudy items.  One nice thing can be enough.  Such as a heart shaped bowl of red and pink candy or flowers for Valentines Day on the coffee table or kitchen counter.  A beautiful American flag flying in front of the house for the 4th.  Fall would include pumpkins and cinnamon-y potpourri. Wreaths are a given year-round.

Birthday Celebrations -- I want to celebrate every birthday in the house with whatever the birthday boy or girl wants to do.  This would not have to include a big party every year, but could instead be a fun family outing chosen by the birthday person or a meal specially prepared and chosen by the birthday boy/girl.  I think birthdays are a big deal and should be treated like a big deal.

Family Vacations -- Ideally these would happen each summer and could be as simple as camping for a weekend or as extravagent as traveling to another state or country.  Being active during these vacations would be ideal, as well as exploring the area we are visiting.  Traveling to visit faraway family and friends will also hopefully be a regular family event. 

Supporting my family through their extra-curricular activities -- this means attending plays, musicals, sporting events, games, tournaments, recitals or shows.  Any enriching experiences my family find themselves inspired to do in their free time, I plan on supporting it as best I can.

Smells -- This topic may sound a bit odd.. but I want to ensure my house always smells good.  I want to have good smelling candles throughout the house with scents that compliment the season.  The smell of dinner will often be the flavor of the day.  I am really in tune with the impact that memory for scents can have. I plan to use the same brand of laundry detergent and dryer sheets for as long as possible. 

Meals and Food -- I plan to have some kind of a meal prepared each evening for my family.  I want to be able to provide healthy and satisfying food for them.  Growing bodies need to be nourished with substantial food.  I also plan to make lunches for each family member, my husband included for them to take to school and work.  My hope is that I will inspire my children to eventually participate in the family food preparation. 

Extended Family and Friends -- I want to have a comfortable guest room (hopefully with an attached bathroom) always ready and available for any family or friends who are visiting from out of town.  Or if someone imbibes a bit too much at one of our parties.  Which leads me to:

Parties -- I want to regularly have family and friends come to visit and/or stay.  And I want to provide a household where they WANT to do that.

As you can see, many of these things are centered around seasons or holidays and all are meant to bring my family and our close friends together with the goal of creating enduring bonds.  One of my greatest hopes is that my family and our house overflows with love and I believe traditions are one way to cultivate that. 

Laura's Famous Guacamole Recipe

Ingredients

• 4 perfectly ripe avocados, halved and peeled (see footnotes)
• 1/2 small white or yellow onion, finely chopped
• 1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
• 1 4-ounce can diced green chilies
• 2 cloves of garlic, minced
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 tablespoons fresh squeezed lime juice
• a few dashes of hot sauce
• Tortilla chips

Directions

1. Combine ingredients in a medium sized bowl.
2. Taste and add more of whatever is needed.
3. Transfer to a serving dish and serve immediately with tortilla chips or cover and chill up to 24 hours. 
4. ENJOY!!

Footnotes

• Choosing the right avocados is 99% of making awesome guacamole.  The avocado is perfectly ripe when you can gently press in on the wide end of the fruit.  Too soft is no good.  Too hard is also no good... if there's no give at all, it's not ready! 

• For smoother guacamole, mash avocados and/or use a food processor to combine all ingredients. For chunkier guacamole, chop avocados into 1/2 inch pieces and combine all ingredients gently by hand.

Whatever happened to...

...the courtesy wave whilst driving?  In case you have forgotten what this is, it's when one car waves first to allow the other to know they see them and that it is safe to go and the second car waves back as if to say "thanks! Have a splendid day." This simple act of kindness could occur as someone allows you to merge, turn first, proceed through an intersection first or as someone stops for you to turn out of a parking lot and into traffic. 

I seem to remember the courtesy wave being an almost everyday occurrence when my parents drove me around as a child.  Have we all gotten so busy and rushed in our lives that the wave is now lost?  Perhaps we are all now such crappy drivers that we have nothing to wave about.  I for one have deiced to do my part in bringing back the courtesy wave.  I think its the least I can do to bring a little love back to the lives of the drivers I share the road with, as well as my own.

Oh and I have also noticed that there are other states in the US where people still do the courtesy wave.  What's up with that Cali?  Not cool.  I hate that we fit into the stereotypes that are already in place about this state.  Time to dust off the 'ol wave and get to shaking it!

What would you do

Tonight as I was driving home, I called 9-1-1 to report the following incident. 

I was cruising down Highway 50 westbound in the fast lane and I saw up ahead there was a smaller sedan at a dead stand still in the slow lane.  This portion of the freeway is currently under construction so there is a cement barricade blocking the right shoulder.  There is no break down lane.  And for some reason, there were no hazard lights flashing on this stopped car. I immediately thought, "Oh man, that is not good." And as I got closer, I saw that the driver of the vehicle was out of their car standing in front of it in the bright headlights frantically motioning for drivers to move over to the left lane.  I should also add that it was dark, and it rained all day today so the roads were wet.  As I passed the vehicle and driver, I watched in my rear view mirror and saw a car approaching the stalled vehicle, and was luckily able to slow down and move over in time to avoid a collision.

About 30 seconds later, I called 9-1-1.

I can't help but think - what IS the best practice if my car brakes down in an area that has no shoulder and I have no hazard lights?  I certainly do not think I would get out of the vehicle and try to wave speeding cars around me, especially in the dark.  Do I hop over the cement barricade and hope for the best??  Sit in the car and press on and off the brakes so at least the lights are flashing??  Maybe start with the simple stuff - 1) always making sure I have enough gas in the vehicle and 2) knowing precisely where the button is located for my hazard lights.

The Big "O"

Interesting study (link here) I read today...  Shocklingly (sarcasm), there appears to be some discrepancies between the number of orgasms men report to be giving to their sexual partners and the numbers of orgasms women are claiming to actually experience.  I love that someone took the time to study this because it is something I have thought about.  How can we account for this (rather huge) difference?

Women fake it. Some of them often.  Some of them all the time. As in, every time.  And men have no freaking clue.  When asked, it seems most men will proudly report, "No woman has ever faked it with me."  I hate to break the news to you but look at the stats, Buddy.  The chances are high that at least one of those Os was a fibber.  Now whose fault is this?

As much as it pains me to admit this, us women really cannot blame the men here.  We are not doing ourselves any favors here with the faking it.  It is only reinforcing the (insert ineffective-and-sometimes-painful-sexual-technique here).  Rest assured he will be doing the same thing at the same speed in the same position next time.  Ladies -- it's time to step up to the plate and get some honest communication on the table when it comes to what you want need in the bedroom if your goal is to achieve the O.

Technology is probably also to blame.  The porn industry has put some ridiculously high expectations in both the female and male minds when it comes to sex and it is a sexual experience that is readily available 24 hours a day.  Unlike living breathing sexual partners.  I could go off on this topic but I will save that for another post.  Let's just leave it with this - everyone achieves an O in porn escapades.  Often this occurs multiple times within one encounter.  And how convenient that it happens to happen within a limited time-frame.  Porn is not reality.  (Thank God.)

The porn talk leads me to this: I get that men put a LOT of pressure on themselves to perform.  But they often put even more pressure on the women.  "Did you have an O?"*  If the answer is not a positive one, you have simply ruined his world.  Talk about pressure. 

Many women do not take responsibility for their own Os and instead leave it all to men expecting that it's his job to please her.  Let's back this up a step and ask the most important question of all - does she know how to please herself?  Because if this answer is no, my guess is that it's gonna be next to impossible for him to figure you out.

If you fall into the category of a female faker or the category of a man who still truly believes no woman has faked it with him..... please take a look at this study.  Bon Appetit!


*If you really have to ask, the answer is most likely no.